Dead Meat on Valentine’s Day!
I knew it wasn’t a good idea to begin with. Turns out, I was right. In a recent post (“What’s the Worst Valentine’s Day Gift Your Spouse Ever Got You?”), I mentioned I ordered steaks for my wife. It was an online Valentine’s Special from Omaha Steaks.
That was two weeks ago. Today is Valentine’s Day. No beef. So I called Omaha Steaks:
- Me: “Where’s the beef?”
- OS: “What?”
- Me: “I ordered your Valentine’s Special two weeks ago. It hasn’t come yet. As you know, today is Valentine’s Day.”
- OS: “(checking on it) So sorry. It looks like you’ve had some bad weather (no kidding). We couldn’t deliver it. Your steaks have been waiting for delivery for two weeks. They should come today.”
- Me: “Today?”
- OS: “Right. But don’t eat it. They’re spoiled by now.”
- Me: “Thanks. I’m dead meat.”
Actually, I’d really be dead meat if I gave her a slab of beef for Valentine’s Day. I’ll never forget what happened when the UPS guy delivered that Buttmaster to our door. Neither will he.